When I was single, I really struggled with the sound of silence. I would often fill the quiet with TV or music -- anything, really.
When Life Doesn’t Work Out Like You Planned
Every now and then I have days where everything feels fuzzy and uncertain. It is almost as if I am living in a dream. But this dream is not one full of warmth and comfort, certainty and passion—it is a dream where all ease has passed away; I am left on the brink of uncertainty, … Continue reading When Life Doesn’t Work Out Like You Planned
Doing Little Things For the Love of God
Every task can be sacred. That's what I'm trying to learn.
What Success Really Looks Like For The Believer
Like most people in this world, I am terrified of failure. I fear failing the God I follow, the people I love and within the positions I fill.
The Tyranny of My Own Goodness
I am good. I am not. I am nothing without fault. But I'm pure. No, I'm false. I am empty of all that's ought. See, I'm striving. I am grasping. But I'm still short of what's lasting. Yet I'm working. I am yearning. I am all fails, never earning. I am death. I am weary. … Continue reading The Tyranny of My Own Goodness
7 Truths To Remember Every Day
One morning after waking up AGAIN with that feeling of discontentment and anxiety, I decided to sit down and remind myself of some always-true truths.
6 Things to Look for In a Spouse That Really Matter
For a long time, my romantic ideals were a bit, how do you say, UNREALISTIC. But there are a few truly deep, meaningful characteristics that I've realized matter most when you're thinking about marrying someone.
An Open Letter to Christian Brothers & Sisters
It's not that you're cruel or ill-intentioned. But I swear to you the minute these words or verse pop out of your mouth, I WILL RUN FROM YOU.
Your Beauty Does Not Diminish My Own
As a woman, I have been taught to be envious of beauty. I have learned to undermine the beauty I see in other girls.
A Story of Unbelief
I want to not be scared, nor anxious, as I lean into You. But some days the haze is so powerfully persuasive, and I am so easily persuaded.
7 Surprising And Ridiculous Revelations From Marriage
Oh, marriage. It is glorious. And it is difficult. And it is downright interesting at times. I've only enjoyed the throes of wedded bliss for about 2 1/2 years, but here are a few of the most surprising, ridiculous and humbling realizations that have come out of those years. Feel free to comment and share … Continue reading 7 Surprising And Ridiculous Revelations From Marriage
Oh Sweet Submission
Oh sweet submission, tis my delight.
To turn myself over, whatever the fight.
To yield and defer to Who loves me the most.
And surrender my soul, my life, my voice.
A Tale of Feeling Ugly And Worthless (And The Hopeful Ending)
My whole life, I struggled with feelings of worthlessness and unattractiveness. It took years to set me free.
We All Need A Friend To Tell Us Life Sucks Sometimes
It’s a well-documented fact. OK. Maybe that’s not true. I don’t have studies lined up here. But what I do have is a few decades of experience that tell me this is, in fact, the case. Everyone needs at least one friend who can listen to them and respond with, “Life really sucks sometimes.” This … Continue reading We All Need A Friend To Tell Us Life Sucks Sometimes
An Open Letter to Christian Nice Girls
I am not you. GOODNESS, I am not you. And I am sick to death of the Christian culture that assumes I should be more like you.
Nobody Is Strong Enough For This Life
"O God, early in the morning I cry to You. Help me to pray and gather my thoughts to You, I cannot do it alone."
Why I Begrudgingly Choose To Exercise In The Morning
I wish I could say it’s because I’m so dedicated to fitness. But really, it was an act of desperation.
My Husband Can’t Fix Me
I wish that his entrance into my life would have immediately resolved all my issues. That our marriage would evaporate all my insecurities and fears.
My Husband Can’t Read My Mind
Don’t equate your husband’s love with him being able to read your mind.
An Ode To A Haircut
And now for something completely different. My regularly-scheduled, more serious posts will return next week.
Marriage Is Like A Beautiful Old House
I am convinced that marriage is like buying a beautiful old house.
The Battle of the Head & The Heart
I was like a see-saw for a good part of my life as a Christian woman. It would only take a small amount of force to swing my emotions up and down, with my actions following after.
I Don’t Need To Be Good Enough
I wrestle with feeling like a giant failure. Like I've fallen short and have not been a "good enough" friend, wife and Christian.
Why Being Jealous Is Easier Than Practicing Contentment
It’s embarrassing how easily I get jealous. And I’m not talking about the type of jealousy that revolves around my husband.
5 Books That Can Change Your Life
I have 5 specific books that have deeply influenced my heart, mind and walk with God. I think they could change your life.
How To Make Relationship Goals You Can Actually Meet
On my daily commute to work, I listened to a podcast called, "What's It Like To Be Married To Me?" And the wheels started turning.
A Prayer For The Dark Days
Lord, I know you can do all things. I just don’t know if You will do this thing.
5 Things I Learned My First Two Years of Marriage
In about a week, my husband and I will notch our second anniversary. Here are five of the biggest things that I learned during our newlywed years.
Love Is Different Than You Think
When someone caught my interest at 28, I found I did not have a grasp on what love really was.
The Funny Thing About Depression
However it shows up, the way it lies to me is always the same. Yet it's so easy to believe its lies. Even when they've been disproven time and time again.
The Truth No One Tells You About Marriage
I've got a confession to make: My husband and I speak a different language. At least, some days it seems like that.
The Proof of Love
When someone says, "I love you," to me, I expect the words to be supported by more than words. Love shows up every day in countless ways through unconditional, selfless, and kind actions--as well as a myriad of other attitudes described in 1 Corinthians 13. Were a person to say he or she loved me … Continue reading The Proof of Love
I Don’t Know How To Make Friends
Growing up, friends seemed to pop up like daisies, showing up in my life with little or no help from me. Then I became an adult.
The Best Stories Tell The Truth
“'But please, please - won't you - can't you give me something that will cure Mother?' Up till then he had been looking at the Lion's great feet and the huge claws on them; now, in his despair, he looked up at its face. What he saw surprised him as much as anything in his … Continue reading The Best Stories Tell The Truth
You Aren’t Alone In Your Failure
We all feel like failures sometimes. Like we don't know what we're doing or how to do it well. Like we're letting people down or screwing up everything we do. Like we're just not "good enough." Well, frankly, nobody is "good enough." And nobody is as perfect as he or she may seem from the … Continue reading You Aren’t Alone In Your Failure
The Heart of Life
The beauty is undeniable.
Heartbreakingly, awe-strikingly undeniable.
But the pain is still there.
I Don’t Want To Read Your Mind
It's a dance I've done a million times, both as a leader and a follower. But I'm tired of this waltz. And frankly, I won't do it anymore.
5 Things To Do When Everything Stinks
Think of these tips as providing a breath of relief and a glimpse of hope when life gets hard.
When You Believe, Whatever The Outcome
The truth is, sometimes you know in your mind God is good, but your heart struggles to understand how He could love you and allow the pain.
Honesty Is My Only Policy
If I could give one piece of relationship advice, it would be to be honest. But honesty is not simply saying whatever pops into your head. What it really entails is admitting what’s behind surface emotions, and reactions of anger and irritation. It means digging into the hurts and pain within the heart. It means … Continue reading Honesty Is My Only Policy
I Want To Be Dumb In 2018
Passions are liken'd best to floods and streams: The shallow murmur, but the deep are dumb; So, when affection yields discourse, it seems The bottom is but shallow whence they come. They that are rich in words, in words discover That they are poor in that which makes a lover. -Sir Walter Raleigh I stumbled … Continue reading I Want To Be Dumb In 2018
When You Know You’re A Mess (And It’s OK)
"You seem perfect," said someone to me recently, "Like you've really got it all together." Cue shock and amazement that my lil' old self can EVER come off that way, even for a short period of time. In fact, 50% of the time I feel like a gigantic mess of a human being. It used … Continue reading When You Know You’re A Mess (And It’s OK)
Remembering How To Love
When someone says, "I love you," we expect the words to be supported by action. Love is unconditional, selfless, kind and a myriad of other things described in 1 Corinthians 13. Were this person to say those words and then act in such a way that harms, disregards or hurts the object of love, we … Continue reading Remembering How To Love
The Stubborn Strength of Beauty
Beauty cries out to me. She beckons my attention in a noisy and crowded world where I too quickly grow numb, distracted, detached. I blame it on my eyes; they spoil me. For their powerful function allows me to look and look and look--without requiring me to see or notice or appreciate. This is my quest. To notice. … Continue reading The Stubborn Strength of Beauty
When I Want Run
This morning, I woke up depressed. Before I had even opened my eyes, I felt crushed by disappointments, exhaustion and the general weight of daily responsibilities. These are the moments where I choose. I choose to lean in and deal with whatever is going on inside of my heart and mind. Or I choose to … Continue reading When I Want Run
In the Shadow of My Idols
Do you see my idols? I do not worship the pagan gods of old with their gold overlays and silver adornments. Nothing so ridiculous as that. Instead, my idols come neatly-wrapped in culturally-appropriate packages. Hard to recognize, yet insidious all the same. Emotions, Productivity and Validation boast well-used altars which have been dismantled and rebuilt, … Continue reading In the Shadow of My Idols
When You Don’t Know How To Live
Truthfully, I simply don't know where the line is between enjoying the comforts God has given me with a grateful heart, and living a numbed, comfort-driven life.
When Alone Time With God Is Hard
My heart awakens to every new day like a dormant coal. Its blackened, hard nature needs much assistance to fan into flame and renew a pursuit of the Lord.
There’s A Plank In My Eye
“Lord, show me the plank in my eye.” That was me not too long ago, praying in my kitchen out of desperation.
Why I Was Scared To Marry My Husband
Almost right up until to our wedding day, I struggled with anxiety about the future. I never reached a moment of perfect, unending certainty that my husband was the person I was meant to marry.
